“Forgiveness is like faith. You have to keep reviving it.”
In a pretext article, “Forgetting Flowery Forgiveness,” we talked about acknowledging your true emotions so they can dissolve into loving forgiveness. Being authentic with ourselves is how we will find peace within and for ourselves. Speaking our own truth, in our own voice, in our own way (even if it’s a tad ugly) will lead us into more truth. Being truthful will show you where you are in your thinking process and where you need to adjust which is why forgiveness is necessary, continuous and its own path to freedom.
Holding on to old stuff, begrudging is a guarantee for a few things… a shorter, less fulfilling quality of life. Anger shortens your length of days. Hanging on to, remaining angry, and being angry… we experience a shorter day. Why? Because we’ve been caught up in the anger, nursing it or the angry thoughts or feelings are running rampant, feeling out of our control. False. It is within your control… are you ready to confront your angry feelings? Anger, resentment, begrudging becomes its own cancer causing ailments in the body.
Necessary. People, including ourselves in the bunch, are not perfect. Can we say it again? People are not perfect. We need to know we are redeemable, that our mistakes or experience are not the be-all-end-all to our life. Our experiences do not equal to our character; however, our character does influence and impact our experiences. Fortunately, character can be modified. We will continually have to forgive ourselves and forgive other people… Continually.
Continuous. Forgiveness is a practice. We forgive once, twice, an umpteenth millionth time… still, we practice the act of sincere forgiveness to get to the freedom of not holding ourselves hostage. You need or want at some point to feel as though you have fulfilled forgiveness.
A great book by Mary Tumpkin, “Why to Forgive,” demonstrates simply, directly why it’s important to forgive, not necessarily reconcile, but forgiveness for the individual is key. She offers a regimen. Try it for yourself: Spend 30 minutes before bedtime consciously forgiving. Anyone who comes to mind, anyone who offended you throughout the day, anyone who offended you in the past, whoever comes to mind during this concentrated meditative time say, “I forgive you.” This practice is quite powerful. You will find immediate results like better sleep, more energy in the morning, more peace within your soul.
Freedom. Do press through the resistance to hold on to bitterness and anger. Staying in a state of rage, whether boiling or simmering, is not a healthy state of mind or being. Uncontrolled anger can cause us to implode or explode—neither are good resolutions. In fact, unforgiveness or uncontrolled anger can cause more damaging effects than what we desire. Additionally, you won’t try to reenact the offense to regain whatever lost pride or humiliation. These perpetual mental reenactments have us potentially acting out on the wrong people, potentially jeopardizing healthy relationships or prosperous blessings because our mind plays back the tape of when Johnny-be-bad broke our heart… let it go.
Letting it go… The phrase, “Just let it go” would annoy me because it absolutely eluded me. How do I let go??? When someone would add the “just” to the statement implies it’s something simple or within my hands with a simple muscular release… Not so simple when your mind has a grip around the offense.
Some pains don’t leave easily. Why? Because we have a nature to nurture protecting ourselves built into our Central Nervous System. Being hurt does not feel good to our natural, spiritual selves. Nonetheless, we must accept imperfections, human frailties, ugly, inexcusable behavior and even unconscionable acts as part of the human condition. True.
Listen to this quick video from Dr. Laura Schlessinger on the four things she believes should happen before you forgive. It is enlightening.
Nurture the light inside of you; ensure it does not go out. Darkness has its mysteries, excitement and torment. Light is good.
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Thank you. Have a love filled enlightening day!!